What James Malinchak Teaches About Ego Versus Bank Accounts By Andrea Adams-Miller

By Troy Dickson

"Don't fill your ego! Fill your bank account." James Malinchak shares this quote frequently with his audience and his customers. However, it wasn't until my first one-on-one coaching day that the phrase actually hit home for me. When James asked me questions to learn more about me, I was pleased to share all the various things I was involved. I was beaming at all the sacrifice, energy, and time I was investing to what I considered fundamental causes. Then James asked me how all my volunteerism was affecting my loved ones and my business.

Literally, I hung my head. My ego as a giver was instantaneously depleted. I admitted defeat. I was exhausted; my funds were exhausted, and my family didn't see me unless they were volunteering with me. I noticed I was giving it ALL away - time, money, and energy to the point that I did not have time, money, or energy left to give away anymore. James helped me to realize this by making a time wheel to show me where I was off balance. He described to me that in my attempt to be a giver I was giving to the point that I wouldn't be able to give any longer - soon!

He explained to me that by not creating a balance of give and take with myself my family, and my business, I was removing the ability to continue giving as I enjoyed. He showed me how I could reorganize time, energy, and money into my own company. This reorganization placed my company in a stronger financial position. In this new position of financial stability, I can choose which charities and organizations I wanted to donate my time, energy, and money. He explained to me that in filling my ego as a giver, I was depleting my physical and emotional bank to the point of bankruptcy.

The fact that my family had been telling me that for years had gone ignored. To hear that information hit me from a mentor that I had invested thousands of dollars in, well, it hurt; it was embarrassing. Not able to contain myself, I cried. Yes, I cried in his office for practically the entire session. Normally, people would be angry at someone for telling them this information. However, I was thankful. Through my tears, I nodded, "Ok. Ok. Ok." All the while, he kept being honest with me.

I thought I was successful with my business, and to the outsider I did appear successful. On the other hand, he explained how I could be so much more. He was blunt with me that he could have said, "Kudos to you, Andrea, for all your service and dedication to your community." He said he could have allowed me to continue to feed my ego, but he said that I hired him to mentor me to take my business to a higher level. He reminded me I had hired him to tell me the truth about where my business was headed.

When he mapped it all out, my business was headed to that point of becoming a charity, a non-profit. To which, he expressed if I wanted to continue as I was doing business that I could apply for grants and become a legitimate non-profit business. But, he did not think that is what I wanted from my application essay. He was right. I wanted more than ego. I had been in the theater; I admit I love the applause, but a standing ovation does not pay the mortgage. The 'good jobs' and 'thank you's' did not provide for my children. Frankly, the prices I was undercharging were diminishing the experience, knowledge, education, dedication, overage, time, and passion I have for what I do as an interpersonal and business consultant.

I wanted more, and dedicated myself to following his advice. In just a short time, there has been a incredible turnover, a change of events. Some of the charities I had to step back from until I have stored up the time, energy, and funding to invest in them again. Although, I have been able to remain a strong supporter for the ones I love the most. My clients are happy, and new clients are attracted to me for the increased dedication I have to my craft. Expansion has been fantastic and overall success has never felt so good. Overall, I have been filling my bank account and incidentally that is filling my ego, something James Malinchak might have left for me to discover for myself!

Andrea Adams-Miller is known by the media as "The Leading Interationa Authority on Healthy Relationships." She's a keynote speaker, relationship as well as business relationship consultant, columnist, international award winning radio show host, and best-selling author. She shows people how they can create, retain, and sustain REAL lucrative relationships for life!

About the Author:


Post a Comment